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Friday, October 17, 2014



To all my friends and beyond:

There is a new vulnerability out there that you can take proactive steps to protect yourself from. The attack is known (for reasons I do not know) as the POODLE Attack (and no, I am not messing with you).

It exploits a weakness in OpenSSL .v3 and it is not to be taken lightly. Below are some simple steps you can take to safeguard your browser:

Disable SSLv3 in your browser:

 ■ Firefox:
SSLv3 will be disabled by default in Firefox 34, which will be released on Nov 25.  In the mean time, an Add-On has been released to enable configuration of SSL options:

■ Google Chrome:
Add the following after the command line in your shortcut:

So for example, if you right click the icon on your desktop and select 'properties', or in your Taskbar right click the Chrome icon and then again right click the, 'Google Chrome' option shown just above the, 'Unpin this program from taskbar' and select 'properties'. then select the 'Shortcut' tab and change the target as follows:

Before change
"C:\Program Files (x86)\Google\Chrome\Application\chrome.exe"

After change
"C:\Program Files (x86)\Google\Chrome\Application\chrome.exe" --ssl-version-min=tls1

Note: if you are in Windows 7 or 8.x your target may read:


Just add the above listed edit as so:

C:\Users\\AppData\Local\Google\Chrome\Application\chrome.exe --ssl-version-min=tls1

■ Internet Explorer:

Enter the following into your 'Run' command (If you do not see a 'Run' command search for it):

Control Panel\All Control Panel Items\Internet Options

Alternatively, you can manually navigate to Control Panel and choose 'Network and Internet', then select 'Internet Options'. Once there, do to the, 'Advanced' tab, scroll to the bottom of the list and uncheck the "Use SSL 3.0" box.

Now click, "Apply", and then click "OK"

You are now DONE

Let me know if you need any assistance.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Words Paint Their Own Picture

So I decided to try something. I wanted to see what a word cloud based on this blog might look like. It's kind of funny because, honestly, I thought the biggest word in the cloud would likely be 'Pain' or something similar. I was pleasantly surprised.

Friday, May 30, 2014

If Only It Were True...

So, I just woke from this kewl-krazy ass dream where I was a scientist working on a government backed research team in an alternate universe we had reached by using a trans-dimensional doorway we discovered in a protective dome under the Greenland ice sheet.

While working there, we had discovered advanced equipment that allowed for a complete backup of a persons entire mind and personality and provided almost continuous incremental storage of said information via an implanted device that allowed for synaptic duplication and storage.

While working in one of these machines, a coworker inadvertently tripped an alien fail safe device which resulted in a massive and complete, nearly instantaneous incineration of all living matter within a ten mile radius of the base.

The kewlest part was that the synaptic monitoring devices, which remain undamaged, also allowed for suspension of all pain reception to the brain milliseconds before the incineration, so no pain was felt.

However the absolute best part was when I awoke in a previously undiscovered facility a few mikes outside of the incineration zone, in a new synthetic body that was stronger and more advanced that my old human body was....but the best part of that 'best part' resurrection? I was no longer in constant and viscous pain...

...then I woke in bed...back in my massively pain riddled body...but for a moment there...I was FREE!!

Now, to see if I can get back to sleep.

Friday, May 23, 2014

Life in A Nutshell

We all die eventually and although it is my hope to live a very long and happy life, the real deal for me is that I am still making a difference in people's lives all along the way.

To me, the parameters that tell me that my life and my work is what will make me happy can be loosely summed up in two simple, yet far reaching (at least for me) things:

1) I am happy doing what I am doing...

2) I am wanted andappreciated by those around me.

3) that I am making a difference in the lives of the people around me.

Simple does not have to mean shallow and a full life does not have to mean a life that is stuffed full of activities.

Saturday, November 30, 2013

Dark Night...

And so I am locked in the throws of battle...

Every labored breath brings a mix of deep throbbing and sharp staccatos of pain...

Every movement brings forth a symphony of daggers and clubbing blows...

It is a fight I cannot win and must not lose...

And though there are comrades at my back, both near and afar, it is a fight born out alone as the darkness looms around me...

Sometimes, such as I do now, I feel I cannot endure this war, but there is no retreat and there is no reprieve...

And so I persevere knowing that this hell will not last forever -- I just wish it would end. 

I am in a dark place and the light of 'one day' no longer is there to give hope of the light.

But (and I know you should never start a paragraph with 'but' however at the moment I do not give a rodents rump for rules) I will never give up and I will win this struggle -- why? how? -- simple, I am a very stubborn, relentless, and optimistic hardheaded teddy bear!

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Sometimes We Make It More Complicated Than It Needs Be...

I ran across this a while back and at the time it struck me how true it is, so I saved it so as to share it one is that day...


I love you. It's not a weight you must carry around.
I love you. It's not a box that holds you in.
I love you. It's not a standard you have to bear.
I love you. It's not a sacrifice I make.
I love you. It's not a pedestal you are frozen upon.
I love you. It's not an expectation of perfection.
I love you. It's not my life's whole purpose (or your's).
I love you. It's not to make you change.
I love you. It's not even to make you love me.
I love you. It's as pure and simple as that.

~ Anonymous

Friday, October 25, 2013

Hope Is The Bridge, Not The Destination

Woke at 3:00am and my pain has determined I have slept sufficiently for now...I disagree, however I do not get a vote on this.

On the bright side I am, as always, grateful for life.

I read a very sad article just a few days ago about a man who, like me, faced constant debilitating back pain. As I read that article I found myself empathizing with his emotional position.

Now to be clear, there are significant differences between me and the man in the article, but we will get to that later.

There is an incredible feeling of despair that can build up when you live with the kind of pain and suffering I live with everyday. I, like him, have periods where I contemplate my future and when looked at with unbiased eyes, I see the potential for becoming a significant burden to those around me. I would be propagating untruths if I did not say that this makes me very sad inside.

Furthermore, I think of the things I have hoped to do, 'one day', and see myself as precluded from those hopes ever coming to fruition and this deepens the sadness even further.

People who do not live with this kind of pain cannot possibly understand how dejected and unwanted it can make those of us who do live with it feel. I do not say this to diminish the sincerity of their sympathy, but there is a vast difference between sympathy and empathy and those who do not face day after day of intense and crippling pain simply cannot comprehend how this can accumulate like a toxin in our hearts and minds.

There is a saying we have all heard which is very applicable for those who struggle with intense chronic pain, "familiarity breeds contempt". Those who are close to those who wade through this life of pain are the most likely ones to fall into this trap. This is not to be seen as an indictment on those who live with us and are close to us, no matter their physical distance, but more as a waving flag of caution to help us avoid the pitfalls it can produce. For it can lead those who are around us the most to become desensitized to what we face and at the extreme, to make them ambivalent to it. It is just human nature. This can be very devastating to the ones living in the hell of chronic severe pain, because we then feel even more alone and dejected. This can lead to extreme consequences, as it did with the man in the article I referenced at the beginning of this extremely long monolog...he attempted to end his life.

This is where that poor tortured soul and I diverge. I have never seen, and hopefully never will see, ending my life as a viable option. Not because of any 'religious' or 'spiritual' taboos or their consequential implications, but for one reason and one reason only...I have too much to live for.

I love those whom I love too much to ever leave them with the sadness and destruction that suicide brings about. And this love is not based on the degree of love (real or perceived) that is returned in kind, but solely on what is in my heart.

I cannot live with the hopes of what may come about, 'one day' as an anchor for my life. Many things that I have hoped for, 'one day' now seem to no longer be on the table.  These hopes are gone for reasons not controllable by me. They have drifted away and now seem to be clearly, never to be, based on what I currently see as their possibility.

However, for me, that changes nothing. I still have that love in my heart and that will never change. It is that love, for those I choose to love and for the life I have, pain included, that I will never step away from.

I am not the religious man I use to be, but that is not to say I am not still spiritual. There is a proverb that says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." I have many longings...some I truly hope will one day be fulfilled and others that I have come to accept, based on their current state, are likely to never be. However, I will never lose that hope and never lose my love for this life.

And so I keep going and will keep going, regardless of the pain that wracks this body, because I have hope that there are still amazing things before me and those are the destinations I am looking forward to seeing.